Letter #19122: Can't get you out of my head

I've never forgotten about you.

More than a decade and you still fill my dreams. Only it probably isn't the real you. Not when I haven't known the real you for years. It's all just a memory that for some reason my subconscious will not stop holding on to. 

Usually I forget. I wake up and it feels like sand slowly slipping through my fingers until it's just a vague sense of butterflies and gentle touches. But today it's different.

I was lost.

I was just trying to find my place in a sea of never ending faces. 

Then I see you.

Sometimes in my dreams I pretend that I didn't have feelings for you. You show up and you're just far from reach, living in your own world and crossing paths with mine here and there. These dreams are closer to the truth. But sometimes I give in. I let myself believe that you were mine, and I was yours.

I see you and I'm home.

We settle into whatever story the dream was unfolding into. Some activity orchestrated by an invisible hand. But I'm no longer lost. I could feel your hand gently touching my lower back as if saying I'm here and I'm never going away.